Posts filed under ‘Uncategorized’

AllKpop is a Fucking Wanker

Even though no one has posted here in over a year, there are times when justice must step in. This is one of those times.

I am no longer a KPOP fan, and many days and nights have passed in the Kpoposphere. And many, many scandals. Yet when the populace cried, “KOREAN BEEF, WHERE ARE YOU?!?!” it was in vain. Our warrior cloaks dusty, hanging on the clothes rack, with nary a truth harbinger to be seen.

I hope this is the last somewhat serious post on this, and I’m ashamed I couldn’t end it with some joke about Tablo. No, we have discovered an even greater enemy. One that even angers our bitterest arch rival.

Meet AllKpop.
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The filthiest name in Kpop.

Yes, I’m referring to the nudes scandal.

Let’s cut the shit: AllKpop, I am deeply fucking ashamed of what you are. You’re a circus, a joke, and it’s a cold day in hell when you’ve out-depraved Dispatch. Accepting a $3500 bribe and trying to smear a poor girl’s image by bringing back her younger, foolish days is a terrible thing.

“Don’t shoot the messenger?” Bullshit! You accepted them in the first fucking place. Don’t spew that shit around, trying to shrug off responsibility. You posted it, therefore you are responsible for the backlash. You are responsible for the outrage and everything else that comes with it. The lawsuits, everything. It’s the same reason you don’t see nudes of young girls in the newspaper when a similar crime happens. Newspaper corporations get sued and journalists go to jail over this kind of thing.

It is not whistleblowing. This is vicious, petty bullying. And judging by the quick internet google search I did, it’s too late to censor the nudes. You have to remove the page completely to signify that you are actually sorry. An overblown apology letter with no actions does not cut it.

I hope you burn in hell, AllKpop. We’ll see you there.

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(Notice how our responding nude is properly censored with a diaper, also CONSENTED.)

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November 11, 2013 at 11:09 pm 3 comments

Don’t Call It A Comeback. Because I’m Not Quite Ready.

ImageSo… sup. A lot of things happened in 2011 in the kpoposphere but I believe I can sum it up: Blackface, fans being dumb (when are they not), a bunch of new bands, JYJ being shit on, the cat is out of the bag (that is to say: the populace finally acknowledge the fans’ shitty behavior, bunch of shit music, and other shit that I really don’t care to remember right now.

 

On a personal level, there was a lot of offline shit that happened with me that I don’t care to share with you but there’s something that I could no longer deny.

I can’t stop making fun of KPOP idols. It’s way too much fun to rip them a new asshole (especially when they deserve it). It’s way too much fun to stir shit with so-called fans who are willing to tell me their thoughts on shit I don’t care about.

As for the new changes: I’m not going to delete any of the great articles that’s already posted. I’m probably going to reorganize everything and start looking for a new co-writer. I’ll probably just have you guys submit shit to me on my personal email since I don’t remember the password for blog’s and it’ll make me feel important. Different jokes but it’ll be the same shit.

Um. I think that’s it for right now. The only thing I’ll say is: Keep an eye out for Korean Beef’s Twitter (@kpopbeef) for random updates on progress as well as rumors/confirmations in less than 140 characters.

March 17, 2012 at 8:19 am 2 comments

All Good Things Must Come to an End

Everyone knows Korean Beef is the best (as Hyori Lee herself endorses), thus our lifespan was doomed to be short.

The good die young, as they say.

I was ignoring all the comments up until recently because I’m the average lazy Canadian, but since I was bored at 3am and came to the realization all the recent comments left were so well-thought out, well-spelled and spot on with what I vaguely remember their moms saying the night before, I give up. You guys are too smart.

Just kidding. The real reason is I have no idea what’s new with K-POP, and I don’t have any intention of keeping up. How can I run the truthiest K-POP blog since, well, us? I can’t. So I must duck out to another spot in some dark, dusty corner of the Internet drinking haterade and pissing on something else more interesting.

For those who don’t like long-winded farewells, basically I stopped caring about K-POP and also banged your mother last night. Don’t sweat it! It was fun while it lasted.

I don’t know if Starpowder will continue to update this, but I know I’m done. Adieu.

April 20, 2011 at 7:55 am 6 comments

Adventures in E-Mail Diving


We’re just a little odd here.

Sorry about randomly dying like that, Beefcakes. Life tends to be a little bit more important that idols (believe it or not).

Anyway, because the writers here are not in Korea, sometimes we have to order from online sites. They usually take two weeks or so to get to our place of residence and of course we’re subscribed to their newsletters at times.

One of the more popular websites for fans to buy KPOP cds and merchandise are usually YesAsia, GMarket (although I haven’t personally tried that myself), and DVDHeaven.

More often times than not, our favorite KPOP idols (and I say this with the utmost sarcasm) release nothing but crap, crap, crap for fans who’ll happily blow their student loans on.

However, this time it’s different. Because of the drama that’s still going on even though we’re in the new year (eventually, we’re going to have to do our annual Year In Review), nothing is funnier than this.

It’s not even exactly new news that SM Entertainment and Avex are selling TVXQ shit like they’re gold-platted Hummers and really good pizza pops – but I just found this in my e-mail today that I would just love to share with the rest of my wonderful readers:


Oh. Sucks to be a poor Cassie, I guess.

Happy New Year, JYJ and to our lovely readers of Korean Beef!

January 3, 2011 at 7:20 am 4 comments

SNSD Proves Asia + World Just Want Idols with Tits on Them

SNSD benefit from an asset groups like JYJ lack.

SNSD are proving to be the cashcow to save the day for SM Entertainment. After storming through Korea and Japan with their latest hit ‘Hoot’ — a sound every person makes when they see SNSD — it seems like they’re not ready to stop there.

Not only was an article of their success in Japan published onto the Billboard website, there’s rumors floating around a new album may be dropped in spring. We’re sure every STAND, SONES, casual fan and apathetics alike will be creaming themselves silly over this news. We sure are.

Further more, there’s even more rumors they may be expanding into Europe as soon as 2011. Of course, rumors are rumors and we’re keeping our cynic hats on — and Europe?  What happened to expanding to the land of opportunities, SM Entertainment? Are you cheaping out that much?

Of course this really just proves this article’s theory — that the world loves and needs more tits. Unless you work for KBS.

December 5, 2010 at 3:12 am 5 comments

Real Slow Comeback

And real slow Wheesung is indeed. The singer is set to release a new single album RealSlow is Back on August 26th. The new title song will be produced by Kim Do Hoon which makes fans extra excited for some reason, since With Me caused a craze back in 2002.

A company representative confirms this with “The title song is produced by Kim Do Hoon, who created the With Me syndrome in 2002. With this single album, we hope to see Wheesung gaining back his past fame“.

Fortunately for us here at Korean Beef, we don’t hold such unrealistically high expectations. But since the K-poposphere is so oversaturated with girl groups and boybands who can’t even sing with autotune, maybe Wheesung will bring something decent to the table. The world needs more Korean soloists!

Or rather, he better. If he wants to even think about bringing back his past fame, he has several years of epic to catch up on.  Just a “good song” won’t cut it. His very swanky shades do look promising however.

Here’s the new teaser promoting his album:

August 19, 2010 at 12:22 am 1 comment

Developing Suicide Thoughts is SM Entertainment’s Forte

To bring this drama into full circle, now we have potential suicide thoughts. Korea and its morbid obsession with suicide has quite a list of not just your average Hae Yus but also idols. From old washed up models to young and upcoming actors, suicide knows no limits and can attack at anytime. And can happen to anyone.

Hangeng, the only Super Junior ex-member who had enough balls to actually go through with his contract termination and have the ability to have his own solo career (back in his home country – China), appeared on the Taiwanese television show, “Shen Chunhua Life Show”, and revealed that he developed suicidal thoughts while the years he’s been in Super Junior. (more…)

August 17, 2010 at 7:18 pm 2 comments

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