Posts filed under ‘How-Tos’

How To Make a Comeback (The Right Way!)

Lisa Kudrow should have done these tried and tested true tips in order to have a glimmer of success again.

So you’re married, been banned by Tablo, and currently own a major entertainment business in Korea. Now you’re bored. What should you do now? Torturing trainees, making them do Mister Miyagi-esque work around your conglomerate will eventually get boring.  Your current groups are in one scandal or more. You’re going bankrupt because your diamond studded Hummers aren’t as cheap anymore. Your wife’s attention is shifting away towards the new manly girl idol, named Amber, but that doesn’t matter anymore. You’re bored. What are you to do?

Comeback to the spotlight, of course!

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November 8, 2010 at 9:12 pm 1 comment

How To Become a CEO of a Music Label

Logo discovered after wading through 9000 Hangeng images.

So not only are you married, got banned by Tablo and have a successful music career, you are now ready to take the next step in dominating the K-pop market. Not sure what to do now? Well, thank goodness it’s Korean Beef  to your rescue! Follow our very helpful tips, guidelines and heartfelt advice and you’ll have hundreds of underpaid, underfed, obedient idols at your feet while thousands more only wish you could be in their presence.

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September 2, 2010 at 2:52 am 2 comments

How to Maintain A KPOP Relationship.

We have all thought about it at least once – a relationship with Kim Jaejoong must be glamorous! Being graced with his presence as onlookers glare enviously at you. Models snub at you. Fans talk shit about you on the internet while the more dedicated ones not only track your Korean Social Security Number, but sent threatening letters to you. At the same, your own career is taking off (provided you accomplished the following steps on the last how-to). Or if you both happened to fall in love while filming a music video together and you’re already famous. It would still work.

But you don’t know how to keep it! The constant media attention! The phone calls from interviewers, wanting you to spill delicious gossip on which doctor your lover uses for their latest nose job! Fans invading your cyworld about how much of a tramp you are for dating your first boyfriend! The woes! But you’re lucky that you have Korean Beef to help you out! Just follow these steps and you’re sure to stay with your star boyfriend or girlfriend for life!

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August 17, 2010 at 5:00 am 2 comments

Want to become a K-POP Star?

Ever wanted to be a K-pop star? Korean Beef tells you how to be one in no time!

Continue Reading September 20, 2009 at 4:01 am 195 comments


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